Um, can you not?

I like notes: umcanyounot@gmail.com

dear kelly - it’s your day! I know it will be filled with the people & things you love. I hope you spend your day laughing and feeling loved and appreciated. because you are, my sweet friend. happy, happy birthday to one of the kindest souls I’ve ever known. a beautiful day & year to you. cheers! 

Fact: GIS Dwight Schrute will lift any spirits that need… lifting. (It made more sense in my head.)

My name is Russell Greene. Maybe you passed me and my family out on the highway. Maybe you were driving some fancy sports car or an old beat up four-door. Maybe you had someplace to be. Or maybe like us you’re living out your dream with your house hitched up behind you, and America the Beautiful up ahead. But whoever you are you be sure to give us a wave the next time you drive by. Cause we’re your neighbors, and we’re all on the road together.
— Opening credits narration of Promised Land

PROMISED LAND. THANK YOU. Carry on. Sorry for yelling.

re: the television show I referenced earlier

What was the name of a show from maybe the mid-1990s about a Christian family (maybe 3 kids?) who traveled around the U.S. (I think they lived in an RV), and spread Christianness? (Or Christianity, whatever.) I think it was on for more than one season and it must have been on a national channel because we were poor as shit and only got ABC, CBS and NBC. 

Help. I spent way too long reviewing a list of all TV shows from the 1990s (it’s exhaustive - check it out), and haven’t come up with my answer.

If anyone says anything about Mary Camden…

…I’ll do something. I don’t know what, but it will be drastic. 

Cardio today: Housing that sandwich (RIP). No photographic evidence, thank god. 

…And washing it down with bleu cheese & bacon potato salad. 

I found this:

Can we do something awkward this afternoon? 

OMG can we have a Tumblr talent show? …how would the logistics of that work?

Remind me that Caitlin and I also need to ask you guys about a Christian family tv show from the 1990s. 

Brb, getting work out of the way so I can PLAY. 

  • Me: I need to know if we're having pizza for dinner.
  • John: I don't know, why?
  • Me: Because if we're not having it for dinner I'm going to get it for lunch.
  • John: Well are there any other dinner options you'll consider?
  • Me: Not really.
  • John: You think way too much about your meals.

I want to have an in-depth discussion about Della Reese. 

Dammit. 

this happened

as did this

in way bigger problems, someone got a tattoo of snooki’s face on their person.